I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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