god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
