If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
