i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
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I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
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Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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