she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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