Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
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