bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
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