I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
