When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
