Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
