I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
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