I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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