"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
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Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
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I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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