go do what you do best...puke behind churches
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I feel great
I just peed on a car
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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