let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
When are your genitals available?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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