I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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