Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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