Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
