i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
