this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You are the jesus of drinking
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
