I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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