Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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