Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
