Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
