Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
