I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize