This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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