OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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