do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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