What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
you will always have a special place in my vag
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
