I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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