Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
