You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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