i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize