i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Randomize