Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
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he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
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cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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