Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
