So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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