dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?