so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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