I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize