eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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