why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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