my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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