I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I just googled if crying burns calories
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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