I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
