Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize