I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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