Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
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