No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize